Gratitude is the Secret to True Happiness

Have you ever gotten to a point when you were just sick and tired of being unhappy?  For a while now I’ve been struggling to really be happy.  It’s so easy to look at my life and see everything that is hard and challenging and just down right not good.  My house and yard aren’t big enough, my children are too messy, my husband is too busy, we don’t have enough extra money, and the list goes on and on.  I don’t feel great about praying that Heavenly Father will take the challenges away because I know that there are things for me to learn.  It’s the figuring out what I’m suppose to learn that is the tough part.  

On the flip side, my husband is one of the happiest and most grateful people I know.  I remember when our first daughter was born almost 14 years ago he thanked everyone in the hospital from the doctor to the people who came into give us our meals and everyone in between.   When I say thanked them,  I mean PROFUSELY!  I remember thinking, “You know they are just doing their job…” as if a thank you wasn’t even necessary.   To this day he still continues.  He is always expressing gratitude to people no matter what they have done.  He doesn’t feel like he “deserves” everything and he doesn’t feel like he deserves more.  He’s just grateful and that attitude of gratitude makes him happy regardless of the circumstances in his life.  

There have been times when he has said to me expressly, “Christie, I don’t think we need more, I think we have enough.  I think that there is a way to accomplish everything we need to do….”  He hasn’t directly come out and said, “Christie, you could use a good dose of gratitude in your life.”  He knows me well enough to know that the direct approach wouldn’t go over too well.  This morning as I was reflecting upon the unhappy state of my heart I realized that much of my problem does lie within myself and it starts (and probably ends) with my lack of gratitude.

The Lord says it so well in so many verses in the scriptures.  Let’s start with the command to be grateful.  (Yep - let’s not water it down any, it’s a commandment) “And ye must give thanks unto God in the Spirit for whatsoever blessing ye are blessed with.”  D&C 46:32  He doesn’t say be grateful when you have something to be grateful about.  He says, “must give thanks”.  That sounds like a modern day  “thou shalt” to me.  He also says, “whatsoever blessing”.  I think that is a nice way of saying “everything.”  

I think the parable of the Ten lepers demonstrates how the Lord feels about the sin of ingratitude.  (Notice I said the “sin” and not the “sinner”.  He loves us all but the things we do can sadden him.) You remember the parable of the ten lepers.  Ten were healed but only one returned to give the Lord thanks.  His response to the one who returned was, “Were there not ten cleansed?  But where are the nine?”  Luke 17:11-19  I think He expected the other nine to return and express gratitude.  I think he was saddened because they didn’t.  The application is true for us.  He expects us to recognize our blessings and express gratitude and thanks for them and it likewise saddens him when we do not.

So why is gratitude such an important virtue to cultivate?  Quoting President Joseph F. Smith, President Thomas S. Monson said, “My brothers and sisters, do we remember to give thanks for the blessings we receive? Sincerely giving thanks not only helps us recognize our blessings, but it also unlocks the doors of heaven and helps us feel God’s love.”  President Monson, “The Divine Gift of Gratitude”, Oct. 2010 I love that last part, gratitude “unlocks the doors of heaven and helps us feel God’s love.”  

It’s so easy to focus on what we don’t have, what isn’t going “right” in our lives, or the challenges and difficulties we face.  It’s the glass “half empty” approach instead of the glass “half full”.  Once again the Savior is our example, remember the time He had been teaching a group of people (over 4000 to be exact) for about 3 days and they were hungry and weak.  He called his disciples and said, “I will not send them away fasting, lest they faint in the way.”  His disciples approached the situation much like so many of us would have by saying, “Whence should we have so much bread in the wilderness, as to fill so great a multitude?”  In other words, “We didn’t bring lunch for ourselves let alone an additional 4000 hungry individuals, what are we supposed to do?”  However, they found seven loaves and a few fishes and that was enough for the Lord.  Here’s the interesting part, we expect the Savior to bless the fishes and loaves and yet if we look closer the scriptures say, “he took the seven loaves and the fishes, and gave thanks, and brake them…”  The miracle occurred after he had given thanks.  The scriptures continue the story, “And they did all eat, and were filled: and they took up of the broken meat that was left seven baskets full.”  Matt 15:32-39  

Now that we better recognize how the Lord views the virtue gratitude, how do we develop this attitude of gratitude? Once again President Monson explains by quoting the words of President Joseph F. Smith, “The grateful man sees so much in the world to be thankful for, and with him the good outweighs the evil. Love overpowers jealousy, and light drives darkness out of his life.” He continued: “Pride destroys our gratitude and sets up selfishness in its place. How much happier we are in the presence of a grateful and loving soul, and how careful we should be to cultivate, through the medium of a prayerful life, a thankful attitude toward God and man!”  President Monson, “The Divine Gift of Gratitude”, Oct. 2010

The way to develop a grateful heart is through a prayerful life.  This is developed as we daily express our gratitude to our Heavenly Father for His blessings as well as to those around us for all that they bring into our lives.  This requires a conscious effort at least until we have learned and cultivated an attitude of gratitude.  

I am going to strive daily to look for things to be grateful for in my life, to give thanks to the people around me and to my Heavenly Father.  I know in my heart that this will bring the peace and the happiness that I need.  I also know that it is one thing to say and another thing to do.  In an effort to keep myself accountable to actually LIVING this principle I am going to spend the next 30 days sharing one new thing that I am grateful for so stay tuned… for 30 days of gratitude.